For me one of the hardest things about all this is trying to stay focused on non-infertility stuff aka my real life...It seems like fertility (or my lack thereof) is the only topic on my mind lately and the only thing I can talk about with others. I know they say the two week wait (after insemination or egg transfer but before you can take a pregnancy test)is the worst part about the whole process but for me (since I have yet to get to that step yet) I feel like I have been in a two week wait that has lasted 4 months. I don't know what I thought when I started going to the RE but I definitely wasn't prepared for such a long time of testing. And while I get that not everyone has to wait as long to start and that my testing time was drawn out significantly due to my re-scheduled surgery, it seems like things have been taking forever which means that all my anxiety and energy has been focused on this for a long time. I find it extremely hard to focus, especially now when I am expecting to (finally) start clomid in about 10 days. At work, which I know I should use as a distraction, instead I am constantly checking calendars or my personal email, waiting for an email from my nurse. Especially on days like today when I am expecting a call from my nurse. I did not leave my desk, afraid that I would miss her call (she didn't get to call until just now, 4:30). I know I am a little (or a lot) high strung/tightly wound/crazy about all of this but going with the flow has never been my thing.
When I spoke with my nurse I almost had a freak out because initially she was thinking that I wouldn't be able to do treatment this cycle. I have been working with the nutritionist to loose weight since they have a BMI cut-off and they won't do treatments if you are above the limit. Thankfully I know I am below it (and have been since I started going there) and am still working hard to keep loosing weight and to be healthier to make a happy space for a baby to grow. Maybe that's what I need to focus on more...Nurse said hubby's semen analysis (SA) was ok but on the low side of parameters for volume, concentration and motility but that since it is such a pain for us to get the SA done (since hubby goes to a VA Dr. and has to get special permission to do out of VA network stuff) and since all that really matters is an after IUI wash look at his swimmers that they can proceed with out hubby going for another! This made me happy. Very happy, even though the numbers are low. So on we go...only 7 more active pills! My nurse also told me that if cycle day 3 (the day to start the Clomid) falls on a weekend (which I think it will) to email her on Day 1 and let her know and that I can come in the following Monday which, even though it delays things a day or two, I am happy about because it means I can go upstate with my sister-in-law and mother-in-law like I had planned to pick some fruit and poke around the cute vintage shops up there. I think that would be a lovely way to (try) and relax before starting treatment. We'll see.
No comments:
Post a Comment